smiling on foot

I’ve been telling my co-workers how “done” I am with this tag line. It’s on everything! Even this blog! Well, it was more towards the beginning of the year, but I’m a little late with this post. I only notice it because the emails I worked on in January of last year included this slogan so I’m more sensitive to it appearing in ads all around me. I even received a religious calendar in the mail with “New Year. New You.” on the cover. Can we think of something else, people? Or are the marketing geniuses of the world too busy making their co-workers crazy to come up with something new? In my experience, it’s the latter. Speaking of which… I won’t go into details… but just want to say it’s been an interesting 2010 thus far and I’m seriously considering changing my career. What could I do with myself that would not require me to stay at work until 7 p.m. three nights a week? Something that would allow me to have a life? I don’t know where these 5:00-release jobs are, but I can’t seem to find them in my current career. I guess I’ll just keep plugging along and hope that things get better… either with a change in career or without.

I do have a new assistant, however, and she just started this past Tuesday. Training is HARD. I have to use my brain so much more and I barely have time for these hours of training. The hardest part seems to be explaining how the different parts of an email swap out based on what type of customer you are… how to recognize and think about the changing pieces, how to code it, how to set it up in the online tool we use and how to know if you did it right. If you’ve never worked with this sort of technology, it’s tough to wrap your head around. And if you’ve been swimming in it for 5 years, it’s hard to explain to someone who doesn’t have much experience in this sort of thing how to figure it out. But it’s her first week and she did pretty well. I’m going to have to think this weekend on a better way to explain dynamic content for her for next week… a “lesson plan” if you will (for all my teacher friends).

Speaking of technology:
My American Express online account just sent me a 2009 summary of expenses. It’s pretty cool how they’ve categorized my spending in 9 different categories: Business Services, Communications, Entertainment, Fees & Adjustments, Merchandise & Supplies, Other, Restaurant, Transportation and Travel. These categories are listed down along the left of the chart and along the top are the 4 quarters of the year of which the spending happened. I’m proud to say I did not use this card TOO much in 2009, but I did falter a couple of times… especially at Christmastime. About $1,000 falls into Merchandise & Supplies and you can expand this category for a more detailed breakdown… where you see this spending was exclusively on clothing. Shocking. Bad, bad LK. The other $700 falls into Business Services but when you break it down the spending is exclusively on Health Care Services. This was all my dental work I had done last fall. How cool that American Express can automatically create this chart? And it’s completely accurate. I love technology. Now I just need to put this S back to zero balance for 2010.

A couple of weeks ago, I used kodakgallery.com’s cool little sidebar app to drag and drop my favorite photos from all my 2009 online photo albums and created a “year in review” of photos. This is always an excellent project. It’s time consuming for sure and I remember last year feeling like I’m never doing this again because it’s so tedious to choose the photos, order the photos to my liking and put little captions on each. But I think the sidebar app made it a little quicker for this year. Of course, the captioning is what takes most of the time, but it’s mandatory in order to tell the story of the year. It took me about 2 hours to put this together and the final product always makes me feel great. No matter how depressed I will be about the cold, snow, work, living with my parents, etc… the Year in Photos is a powerful reminder that my life is pretty damn good.

Click here to see my 2009 year in photos! (Apparently, I attended about a million birthdays in ‘09 – apologies for the lack of variety.)

Now as for 2010:
I’m not going to make any “resolutions” this year, but I do have some general plans. #1 is I’d like to move out of my parents house and support myself like a normal 32-year old (33 in 2 weeks!). I’m afraid to live by myself, but it’s something I’m going to psyche myself up for and force myself to do. Sort of like a “personal challenge” instead of a lame “resolution.” I’m close to paying off one of three college loans and then I’ll start saving for the move. I’m still undecided on the condo vs. apt. decision.  However, I’m leaning towards the apartment after hearing about Xtina’s $3,000 termite damage in her condo and year 2 of water ruining the carpet/wall of KDM’s condo. It’s all their issue that they need to deal with and I think owning has just so much monetary risk that’s scary to take on by myself. (Especially if I’m looking to change my career, right!?) #2 for the new year is just to keep up with my health and try like Hell to get to the gym at least twice a week and continue to eat right. I know that everyone else on the planet has this new year’s goal too, but that doesn’t mean it’s less important. I did really well with it in 2009 for the first time in my life and hope I am able to continue with 2010. #3 is just to continue to enjoy time spent with my friends and my boyfriend. I had been so lonely before I met NF and have had some really good laughs and conversation with him in 2009. I really hope this works out and we have a fun 2010 together too. But, of course, the friends play a big part in my happiness too and will continue to make time to see those smiling faces as well.  Hopefully, with the new assistant, I can do more weeknight outings and have that much more of a more fulfilling life.

We’ll see if the new year brings a new me, I guess!  Happy New Year, Bloggos. :)

Now that Halloween is over… it’s pretty much all downhill from here. I don’t mean to be a negative Nancy, but I just love, love LOVE Halloween and then I hate, hate HATE cold weather and snow. I can’t help but feel a little down trodden once Halloween is over. The cold is creeping in and I’ve already started using my electric blanket. Cold weather tends to make me quite inactive and I’m really wanting to maintain my 25 lb. weight loss from earlier this year. But it’s actually proving quite difficult already.

First of all, I’m dating someone and that comes with nights out to eat and drinking during a new relationship. Secondly, Halloween candy and treats are EVERYWHERE at work. So I’ve gained back about 8 lbs. during September and October. But on the relationship front, I think we’ve now moved into another phase where we can spend a Saturday night cooking and watching a movie “on demand” instead of drinking beers and eating chicken fingers at the Ming. He’s a FANTASTIC cook and is not the mac & cheese kind of guy at all. We eat steak and veggies or stir fry or homemade pizza… mostly healthy stuff. So that should help. However, I find myself trading in my gym-nights to spend time watching TV and drinking wine with him. I need to get better with my 3 x’s a week gym schedule. I’m seriously losing my stamina to stay on that machine for any good length of time. I went on Monday after not going for 2 weeks and it was a poor, poor showing. I’m going back tonight and showing that Precor AMT 100i what I’m made of.

The winter also brings about a lot of family parties and that brings us back to eating. Mum, my two brothers, my sister and myself all have post-Halloween birthdays. My brother, CS, and his wife, LS, have birthdays around Veteran’s Day. There is usually a dinner and birthday cake made by Mum. I haven’t heard if it’s happening this year, but it probably will. And I will undoubtedly pig out on Mum’s cake and eat at least 3 tablespoons of frosting before she even gets a chance to use it. Side note: I’m disgusting when it comes to sugar… and it’s getting worse with age. The candy corn consumption this year was shocking even to myself. I could eat a whole bowl of Mum’s frosting, no problem… especially if it was lemon… mmm lemon frosting…
Estimated weight gain after CS and LS’s birthday: 4 lbs.

Then there is Thanksgiving which is a good excuse for Americans everywhere to partake in some good ol’ fashioned gluttony. Mum makes everything so, so, so good for Thanksgiving. Her apple pie is almost an art form that shouldn’t be eaten… almost…mmmm apple pie… Then there is her famous cheesecake. And the stuffing and the mashed potatoes… and did I mention the apple pie? Then I’m taking some time off work to perhaps go on a road trip with NF and friends. Road trip = fast food and many, many swedish fish for the drive.
Estimated weight gain after Thanksgiving Weekend: 6 lbs.

December brings forth many holiday parties, Mum’s birthday party, Christmas and then New Year’s. Mum makes the most delicious oriental meatballs that are best to consume immediately before cheesecake. I know it sounds strange, but I’ve been eating this combo for so long that I’m conditioned to want cheesecake (but only HER cheesecake) after eating those meatballs. I should mention that she puts delicious, syrupy, canned cherries on top of the cheesecake… mmm cheesecake… I can see my gym visits fading away by mid-December. My sister-in-law, LS, makes a great spread for Christmas Day and usually has these scrumptious little pastries from a friend’s bakery. I so look forward to those pastries. She also has many dishes of Italian food of which I make sure to eat one of each kind: manicotti, lasagna, meatballs, etc. Then on New Year’s, the friends will all gather at HEKD’s and order massive amounts of Chinese Food. Yup, I should be one, blubbery, fat, piece of S by then.
Estimated weight gain in December: 8 lbs.

Then in January, I will celebrate my birthday and my brother, AS’s, birthday. When I celebrate my birthday, I usually do so for at least a week beforehand and indulge in multiple celebrations with family and then friends. I’ll also convince myself that whatever Superbowl party I attend is actually a birthday celebration for me too. And I will go after a plate of nachos like they were made for only me and absolutely necessary to my existence on this planet. After my birthday, the cold weather really starts to affect my mood and ‘eating my feelings’ doesn’t make ‘the cranky’ go away anymore. So I drink heavily instead. Not only does the drinking cheer me up, but also provides my body extra warmth in addition to my new layer of fat. (Smart thinkin’, right?) This phase comes right in time for RB’s birthday weekend in February where I will get stinkin’ drunk in her basement, do karaoke, argue about friends of hers I don’t like, do more karaoke and then end up collapsed on the floor in laughter. It’s also my sister’s birthday, as well as her last born’s birthday. The family will get together for dinner and birthday cake and it’s amazing that we’re all not sick of each other. I think if mum had one more child in the winter, that child wouldn’t get a party… just too much getting together. Good thing my brother and I usually celebrate ours in one combo party. February, I’ll start to try and exercise again, but it will be futile for I will be that aforementioned blubbery, fat piece of S. By March, my spirits improve, I usually start eating better (since there are no family parties) and I’ll probably be better at going to the gym.
Estimated weight gain in January and February: 12 lbs.

If you are keeping track, I’m estimating a 30 lb. weight gain this winter on top of the 8 lbs. I’ve already accumulated. This is not good. After re-reading this post, I think I may have to sit down with Mum and have her plan in advance her menus for all family events. Is this unreasonable? Then I can form an eating strategy for the winter where I’ll indulge once or twice, but other times eat salad, one meatball and maybe one bite of cheesecake. And I canNOT give up on my gym visits… no matter how badly I want to sit on NF’s couch instead, no matter how sniffly I get, no matter how dark and cold it is when I leave work… I must keep up with my good health and not become the Jabba the Hutt of Weytown! There’s just no excuse for me if I don’t. I implore all to send helpful tips on how to get through this winter without gaining back the weight I worked hard to lose!

But when the weather outside is frightful and Mum’s food is so delightful… *sigh*

Ten years from now, we’re all going to look at each other and say, “Remember when we used to put ‘LOL’ on everything?” And then we’ll all laugh and say, “Yeah, HEKD would start and end every email, facebook comment and blog comment with ‘LOL’ back then.” Then I will recall the time when AMR, Bykfam and myself were returning from our MD vacation and Ozzy’s “Iron Man” was on the radio and Bykfam sang “L-O-LOL-LOLOLOLO-L-O-L” to the tune of the popular guitar riff. That story will get a big response for sure.

Then someone will say, “And remember how we used to ‘put on our lollerskates‘ all the time?!” Oh, the roars of laughter will be immense in the future. The conversation will inevitably start turning down the road of other “text speak” like OMG, FML, IMHO and whatever else we can remember. And then we’ll all sit back and reflect at how silly we were with dreamy smiles on our faces.

I’ve been living with my parents for a few reasons. 1) To get ahead in my finances. 2) I’m done living with roommates but can’t afford to live in a 1BR in this area until #1 happens. 3) I’ve never lived alone and would like some transition time to think about it. 4) I’d kind of like to be able to save a little dough towards a condo. As far as #4 is concerned, I’m so wishy washy about the whole idea. At my old age of 32, I should really be looking to invest in some property but the responsibility that comes along with owning something freaks me out a little bit. Just enough to make me rent instead of own? Maybe… I’m just not sure if I want to handle something like that by myself. I’m also hesitant to commit to a particular city or town. I don’t think I’ll be moving across the country or anything, but my recent history shows vast instability in sticking with the same job, apt. or boyfriend for any extended period of time. What if I hate where I live after 3 years and I want to move? Do I really want to risk losing money in my investment or should I keep it to my free and easy apt. living? Most advise me to stick to my parents’ house until I can afford a mortgage on a halfway decent condo. Although I’m up in the air on all this, I’ve been really trying to stick with the condo plan – until this past Monday.

For the past year and four months, I’ve been consistently checking apartments and condos in the south shore area to just increase awareness. I am essentially broke, so we’re talking purely educational purposes. An apartment caught my eye this week on craigslist for a 1BR on Wollaston Hill in Quincy. It’s the top floor of a beautiful old Victorian and only $900/month. Something told me that I had to see it in person. However, I wouldn’t have much to live on after the bills are paid. I figured that it’s a good thing I like grilled cheese sandwiches and called the realtor to make a Wednesday night appointment. I obsessed over whether or not I could afford to live in this apartment and whether or not I should even go see it from Monday to Wednesday. I’m sure I annoyed my co-workers with my apartment talk and even polled them on how much money they live on per month after bills are paid. If I’m unsure about something, it’s all I can think about… a severe disability.

I asked AMR to accompany me to see this place. I was so nervous because I knew if I fell in love with it, I’d have to move into it and then proceed to starve to death. I know this because 1) I’m stupid. 2) I’m sometimes that kind of passionate person who follows her heart no matter the consequences. (And I know 1 and 2 are sort of synonymous.) Thank goodness for level-headed AMR. The realtor took us through the bedroom first and it was a pretty good size, 2 closets and tall ceilings. The previous tenant left a note about a certain cord he had found to bring free cable into that room. Bonus. There was a cute “in between room” when walking from the bedroom to the living room. The living room had been advertised as narrow… but boy was it TINY (and narrow). It looked like a closed in porch with windows lining two of the walls. It also had a working fireplace. Although the house is old and beautiful, the windows are old and terrible. I’m sure all those windows are too old to keep out the winter – and I hate winter. With 3 of us standing in the living room with no furniture, I felt a little too closed in… I can only image putting my futon in there and never wanting to invite people over for fear of claustrophobia. On the other side of the living room was a little “dining room” that would hardly fit any sort of a dining set… even a cafe style would be too much in the way. And then the grand finale was the kitchen/bathroom area. I don’t even think “tiny” could cover it. If I was any bigger than I am, I would not be able to fit into the shower area or be able to take something out of the oven. It also smelled like gas in that kitchen (the scary blow up kind, not the stinky bum kind). I took some photos seen below, but I honestly think they make the place look better than what it was.

AMR and I had a little heart-to-heart in the street afterward. She reminded me how rewarding it would be to own my own place rather than living in some Quincy dump. I’ve since regarded this 3-day apartment obsession as a mere moment of weakness and am back on track for my ultimate goal of world domination, er, buying a condo. I still think it’s a scary endeavor to do on my own, but who knows where my mind will be at in a year. So I’m sitting tight in Weytown and avoiding the craigslist listings to protect myself from anymore moments of weakness!