smiling on foot

My streak of failed relationships is successfully intact. And it’s okay. As a professional girlfriend, I rarely have a relationship that lasts less than a year, but the latest lasted just under 6 months. I don’t know if it’s the short duration of the relationship or the fact that it’s my umteenth boyfriend I’ve had to say Sayonara to (perhaps a bit of both), but I am surprisingly okay with everything. I cried for a week after we broke up and was generally sad for a week after that. I talked things out with a few close friends and then thoughts of him just fizzled away… just like magic. Now that I think of it, a substantial portion of what makes things okay probably has something to do with the low caliber of manhood this particular ex-boyfriend displayed. Breaking up was a no-brainer. But I won’t go into name-calling on this one. We’ll just say he wasn’t for me and I wish him well. I think 6 months is about the time when you get to know someone for who they really are and there’s no more of that “best foot forward” nonsense or even that “rose-colored glasses” nonsense from the beginning months. So you date and get to know each other and sometimes it’s not a fit and you break up before “real” feelings are invested. Not a terribly uncommon story. I think of him fondly as someone who sort of brought me back to life in the romance realm and I’m glad to have known him at this time in my life. And all this being okay is really a shocker for me (and I’m not talking about the hand gesture). I’m usually a lot more emotionally effected by these types of things. Perhaps we should throw in a little “growing up” in the mix too. Whatever the reason may be, it’s obvious that the way my head works has changed significantly over the past couple of years. And for right now, I think I’ve come to terms with not having a boyfriend for a while – there are other things in life I can focus on… and other things I absolutely NEED to focus on to make me happier in this life – that does not involve dudes. So stay tuned for more major personal growth in 2010. Maybe I’ll fall in love in 2011. It would be nice to do that one more time before the end of the world the following year.